The Decision to Stay
by Bitches be tripping
Summary: The story of Seth and Paul. Rated M for a reason and yes it is a slash. Don't read if you don't like.


**Author's note: I'm starting a new story, please don't kill me. *gets into armadillo ball of defense***

**Seth: What the hell are you doing? *laughing uncontrollably***

**Well...Seth, I'm interrupting my other story, to tell Paul and yours story. I'm just hoping that my avid readers don't try and penetrate my armadillo ball, 'cause I'm just defenseless old me. **

**Seth: Ahh, they can deal, right hun?**

**Paul: Right babe. **

**Collective AWE.**

**Let's do this.**

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**Disclaimer: I own nothing, all ownership rights go to Stephanie Meyer. **

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"And I'm bleeding, and I'm bleeding, and I'm bleeding right before the lord." Seth sang along in perfect pitch with the talented White Stripes lead singer, currently blaring from his stereo. He let his voice drop and become gravelly as he sang along, bobbing his head to the familiar tune. He walked around his room in his faded jeans slung low on his hips, he was on the hunt for a shirt, any shirt, he needed to go. He spotted one, a crumpled black one underneath a pile of socks and boxers when Leah belted out his name, "Seth! Let's go, if we're late mom is going to have my ass and when that happens I'm going to wreck yours!" She sounded serious. "Coming!" I chuckled at her as I tugged the V-neck over my head. I took long strides quickly down the steps, making short time of them, I chalked that up to my sudden growth spurt. I finally sprouted up at the halfway point in between seventeen and eighteen. Everyone was making note of it, commenting, congratulating me on the fact that "my balls had finally dropped". Bunch of losers. Jacob loved to rub it in especially, he grew massively a month or so before me and picked and picked and now he remarked on my growth spurt, or coming up as he put it, whenever he had the chance. I was sick of it and reluctant to go to tonight's bonfire and telling of the _legends_ because I was sure Jake and all his meathead friends would be there. I honestly saw no reason to continue the silly tradition and I'm positive Leah saw it my way since she'd have to see _Sam_, that prick, and Emily together. We both only went for mom. Also, lately dad has been on my ass to know our ancestry inside and out and all that is his pride and tradition. Which made it nearly impossible to get out of tonight's bonfire like I've been doing. I pulled my hands through my hair. I looked over to Leah as we approached the outer glow of the fire just behind the tree line, we sighed together. I gave her a small smile of encouragement and she gave me back a sad one. I knew she was trying to convey that she'd be fine, but I knew her better than that. She waved one hand over her mouth and when she uncovered it a deafening smile was plastered to her face. We broke out into giggles and we both made our way towards where mom sat next to dad. Him and all the elders were sitting at the front of the camp fire in a semi-circle, they sat this way every time.

"Hey, Seth." Embry came up and slapped my arm. He was always touching, "Hey Em." I actually liked him, I've just been really on edge lately, like I could erupt at any moment. I looked around, surveying the scene before me, I spotted Leah with mom smiling away, it was so rare that I ever saw her like that anymore. She was slowly getting better. I was startled by a choking sound, I turned quickly on Quil and Jacob, Quil was stuffing hotdog after hotdog into his mouth while Jacob laughed convulsively on the floor. Embry stood in the background chortling, I snorted at them. I heard a tinkling laugh and looked for the source, Kim. Jared's girlfriend. He finally noticed her, she's liked him since primary and he finally noticed her. She was in his arms and he was wrapped tightly around her, possessively. She looked so carefree with him as she laughed at the boys and I never thought I'd see Jared so contempt to just watch a girl smile and laugh. Something about it was off though, she's liked him since forever, then one day, bam. They're a couple and they're inseparable; looking like the cover page of some magazine. Maybe it's just my jealousy talking, I shook my head and piled my plate high with the food all around me. I could never seem to get enough crap in me, I was always starving.

I finished my plate and was searching around the dessert table for something to eat, everything else was gone, ravaged. I spotted a pie unscathed and reached for a single piece when my hand came into contact with someone else's hand. "Oh, uh, sorry. Go ahead." Sam mumbled awkwardly to me. He wasn't meeting my eye, I hated him. I'm sure he could feel it pulsating off of me. "Hey, Samuel." I seethed. He didn't actually do anything to cause this reaction in me I just couldn't help it, I was feeling volatile.  
He still wouldn't meet my eye, his were searching everywhere but mine, with my increased height I was now almost eye level with him and almost as wide. I could take him, I thought. He squared his shoulder's but his eye's were still wide, he looked like he was warring with himself. His body looked poised for a fight but his face clearly showed that he wasn't fully into it. I was always ready to fight with Sam, after what he did to Leah. He left her for her own cousin, Emily. Leah caught them in the act and came home a lifeless body. She walked around for months like a zombie while Sam got nice and cozy in his stupid little cottage in the woods with his new wife. He was supposed to marry Leah, he never deserved her. She was only finally recovering from the damage he had caused. No one but me and my family really knew the severity of her pain, they didn't stay up all night and listen to her cry, or watch as sobs wracked her body for hours on end. They didn't know how she became so small and fragile, because she couldn't keep anything down. I wanted Sam to feel just a smidge of the pain she went through, it'd probably kill him. I know what it did to me. It filled me with unbridled rage and animosity towards him and right now my body felt like it was on fire. Sam was stuttering about something, "I- uh, I came for Emily- she uh, wanted pie. I should get back to her...to Emily." he finished. "Yeah, do that." I bit out angrily, snapping in his face. I was so close, something very dangerous was brimming, threatening to spill over. It felt like my body was vibrating all over. Sam took a smart few steps away from me. I was only focused on him, on wanting to rip his fucking throat out. So many violent images of Sam laying bloodily, broken beneath me were flooding through my mind. I wasn't really one for violence but at this moment I was its bitch, it was overtaking me. "Seth, you have to go!" Sam whispered urgently to me in a hushed commanding tone. Every muscle in my body tightened and coiled ready to spring, I was now definitely shaking, viciously. I hadn't noticed but everyone around me had dispersed and were a long ways away from me, Sam being the only contender. "Fuck you, Sam! You don't fucking own me." I growled out. It was deathly silent. Shooting pains shot out all over my body and I growled, embracing the pain, feeding from it as it slowly ebbed away it left only fury and strength behind. I was going to fucking end Samuel's poor existence. I moved forward, barely standing on two legs, my vision blurred as I shook. My skin was heated and every part of me clenched and unclenched, I found myself baring my teeth at Sam who moved very slowly and cautiously as if he were dealing with a rabid animal. Maybe he was right in that, because that's exactly how I felt. "Seth listen to me! You're going to phase, you need to get out of here now!" He yelled at me. He shouldn't have, a vicious growl ripped from my throat. "I'm going to end you." I was foaming at the mouth and I was emitting long continuous growls.

A strong hand landed solidly on my shoulder and I ceased all movement. With it on me, I felt like I could breathe again. Sam was forgotten, all the rage left my body, I took deep calming breaths getting as much calm as I could from the touch. I turned to see who it was and I came face to face with Paul, his face was solemn but his eyes were alight with something else, something strong and potent. I leaned into him more as he whispered in a strong sure voice, "It's okay, Seth. You're fine, you're fine." He was rubbing and touching me wherever he could, slowly all the pain seeped from my body. Paul's hands left in their wake a numbing sensation, his constant breath was washing over my face and I greedily took in his heady scent. I was humming deep in my chest, when Paul finally pulled his hands away from me. The spell was broken and I stumbled backwards away from him. What in the hell just transpired between us? I turned to see all my family and friends watching me intensely. Most of Sam's gang were giving me this knowing look, Jacob was actually smiling. All these emotions were giving me vertigo. I met Sam's apprehensive gaze, he looked worn and regarded me with a weary expression, like _I _couldn't be trusted. My mom's face was showing open shock and not much else, Leah standing next to her was shaking. She looked scared but she lightly lifted her lips in an infinitesimal smile. I saw my dad's face last, it was grim. His jaw was set hard as stone, his eyes sparkled with something like he knew what I was to become. I closed my eyes and shook my head. What the hell is going on. What just happened, I was so ready to murder Sam. I've never hit anyone, and what did Sam say? _You're going to phase. _Phase? What does that mean, questions were swimming throughout my head, new ones arising in me. I was lost deep in thought when that feeling came back, it was euphoric. I looked to Paul incredulous, "Sorry, I can't really keep my hands off you." He smiled impishly at me like he was embarrassed to admit that and he didn't know why he said it, but he had to. I shook him off, this was all too much. "Get off." I whispered hoarsely. "Touching, always with the touching." I mumbled angrily. I was so confused. I pushed past him and caught a look in his eye that almost stopped me dead in my tracks, Paul looked broken and hurt. I've never seen so much emotion from him. His face was cold and hard I kept moving, running, traveling far away from him and everyone. I need time to think. I made a beeline for the beach.

I was running, exerting all my energy into long strides. I didn't even know why, no one was chasing me. I was running from whatever was back there...a path that my life could possibly take. It felt like everything has been building up to this day, decisions, decisions. I didn't really want to go back, ever. Paul's there though, said a small voice in my head and so is all of your family and friends. What about Leah? Dammit I cursed and a loud growl ripped from my chest, I stopped at a large tree. I paused to take a deep breath, then I hit it. I hit the tree with everything in me, I hated to admit it but I needed to go back, I needed something, I left something behind. My heart was being tugged on by a string connected to...Paul. Paul! What the hell, I swung mercilessly at the tree in front of me. Why do I have all these feelings for him, why can't I keep this rage inside of me under control without his touch. His strong and sure touch, I needed that, I thought. Right now I'm so unsure of myself. I was closer to the beach than I thought. I could still go, I could still leave, I took a step in that direction but my body swayed and turned the other way back towards the bonfire, my family, and Paul. I sighed loud and distraught. Then I ran, I bolted at full speed not even a bit tired from my previous run. I'm sure _Sam _or someone will tell me all about why that is, right after they explain phasing. I was going back, I wasn't going to run anymore I was scared beyond belief but a part of me no matter how small, was eager to see what this decision would lead me to. The decision to stay.

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**I hope you liked it.**

**Please review and let me know what you think.**

**Btw the song in the beginning is Seven Nation Army by The White Stripes. **

**Seth: That's my shit. **


End file.
